Built It, And It Will End

According to the ancient Mayans, the world is scheduled to end in the year 2012. No one is entirely certain why Mesoamerican sky-watchers chose a precise date 2300 years in the future as the end of time, but it is likely that they foresaw the cataclysm of a New York City Olympiad.

In addition to being the ancient world's most advanced astronomers, mathematicians and time-keepers, the Mayans were great sportsmen. The ruins of their ball-playing courts are found all across Mexico and Central America. The great sunken court at Chichén Itzá, the capital of the Maya, was the mega-stadium of its day. Nearly twice as long as a football field, Mayor Bloomberg would be quick to note that even the ancient Mayans had more exhibit space than the Javits Center.

The "game" played at Chichén Itzá was something like a combination of basketball, soccer and the French Revolution. Two teams faced off, using elbows, wrists and hips to hit a basketball-sized rubber ball through a minuscule stone hoop 20 feet off the ground. Virtually impossible to score, the matches supposedly lasted for days under a grueling Yucatan sun. Like a New York City real estate battle, the stakes were high. Engravings on the walls show beheaded players with blood spurting out of their necks, opponents holding disembodied noggins aloft.

Adjacent to the ancient stadium is the Temple of Kukulkán. The 90-foot-tall stone building is, in fact, a huge calendar. The Mayans encoded their mysterious time-keeping system into its architecture. On the spring and autumn equinox, as the sun sets, the light hits in such a way as to give the impression of a giant snake slithering down the side of the temple to join the stone head of serpent god Kukulkán at the base of the main staircase. Take that, Daniel Libeskind, with your Wedge of Light.

The Maya aren't the only ones who say 2012 is it. The ancient Hopi, Inca, Egyptians, I-Ching, and Bible Code hacker Michael Drosnin all prophesize global trial, tribulation and transformation for that year. There are web sites and conferences dedicated entirely to 2012. It's a cottage industry.

Much of it is pretty flakey, but not the Maya. They obviously knew what they were doing. Their calendar system and astronomical observations stand up to modern-day scientific scrutiny. And the stadium bloodsport and big, showy, ego-trip architecture of Chichén Itzá is clearly addressed to modern-day New Yorkers. The message, delivered across the eons, is this: Bringing the Olympics to New York City in 2012 will trigger the End of Days. Let Moscow or Paris host the Apocalypse. We've got enough aggravation here already.

-Aaron Naparstek